Season 8 Episode 3
"The First Pitch Insufficiency"
Wolowitz is nervous after NASA asks him to throw out the first pitch at a Los Angeles Angels game. Also, Leonard and Penny try to prove Sheldon wrong after he says that he and Amy are a "superior couple." [button color="red" size="small" link="http://www.cbs.com/shows/big_bang_theory/" target="blank" ]Official Site[/button]
Howard (Simon Helberg) has to practice because it was Space Day for the Los Angeles Angels (seriously, you're in Anaheim; you might as well call them the Chicago Brewers and Chicago Bucks if you're going to pull that crap) and they needed an astronaut to throw out the first pitch. Ten or twenty rejections later, and Howard's their man! He needed to practice, and Raj (Kunal Nayyar) needed to practice heckling him. (SHELDON: He's right. Given you're still waiting to be picked for a game you played in fifth grade, you probably do suck.) Penny (Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting) was impressed...that Howard got to throw out the first pitch, not his ability to. And being the third-best Quidditch team in Griffith Park doesn't help.
Sheldon (Jim Parsons) had a few dates to make up for because of the time he was away. Sadly, him ordering Cornish hen in order to lecture to their waiter about the town of Cornwall still counts as a date. They came home to find Penny and Leonard (Johnny Galecki) hanging out, and Sheldon thought it would be good if the four of them went on a double date. Until Amy (Mayim Bialik) informed him that it wouldn't count as two dates.
At least Bernadette (Melissa Rauch) was supportive, even giving Howard a rubdown. (yes, an actual rubdown like pitchers get) She played a lot of softball in school, so she offered to help him with his throwing. And maybe butch up his run when he heads out to the mound. (her demonstration of Howard's running style was hysterical) They head to the gym with Raj and measure off 60 feet. Which Howard can't believe he has to throw that far. (HOWARD: You realize this isn't one of those times I want you to exaggerate how long something is!) And yes, practice goes about as well as you think.
Sheldon chose a pub for the double date, mostly so he could go a full hour on the history of Yorkshire because the pub served Yorkshire Pudding. Amy even agreed; it passed after a lively debate by a 2-0 margin. (LEONARD: Nice to see a couple keep the spark of bureaucracy alive.) But Sheldon was not amused. In fact, he said Amy and he had a far better relationship than Leonard and Penny. (PENNY: Isn't this when he says 'bazooka'?) According to Sheldon, Leonard and Penny were the worst couple of the group, outdistanced by Amy and he, Howard and Bernadette, Raj and Emily, and even Penny and chardonnay.
LEONARD: There isn't any ranking. And if there were, we wouldn't be at the bottom.
PENNY: Yeah, and actually, I drink Sauvignon Blanc.
LEONARD: THAT'S the part you have a problem with?
PENNY: (ticked) Just relax.
AMY: (shaking her head) There they go fighting again. You'd never hear her talk that way to Sauvignon Blanc.
OK, Leonard had to know why Sheldon thought Amy and he made the better couple. Sheldon claimed they loved to spend time together, which Leonard instantly calls BS on (particularly given the season premiere, but I'm saying that, not him). But both Sheldon and Amy thought that counted.
LEONARD: That's called parallel play. Toddlers do that.
SHELDON: Not as well as we do.
Sheldon even stopped having a problem taking food off of other people's plates, although his food is still off limits. Leonard still can't believe Sheldon thinks he can quantify a relationship, but Sheldon can quantify anything, even numbers.
SHELDON: French fries? A seven. Spider-Man? Nine! The number Nine? Oddly, only a four.
LEONARD: How ridiculous is he?
PENNY: A hundred.
Berscheid, Snyder, and Omoto did, and they claimed you can quantify a relationship. Yes, it's a real thing. The Relationship Closeness Inventory. (Google it, I swear it exists.) Sheldon dared Leonard and Penny to take the test, which admittedly got Leonard curious. But Penny shot that down quickly and not-so-nicely. She walked away, and Leonard followed her to see what was wrong. She was upset that they were about to get married and they had nothing in common. She was scared, and Leonard admitted he was, too. (PENNY: You being blindly infatuated with me was the rock we were building this relationship on!) They go back to the table, and Leonard defends them, saying just because they didn't have much in common doesn't mean they were a bad couple. Sheldon told them the answer was a simple test away. Now Penny wanted to take the test to get it out of the way, but Leonard held his ground.
PENNY: Why, because you know we're going to do bad?
LEONARD: No, because it doesn't matter. I don't care if we're a ten or a two!
SHELDON: (interrupting) Or a one. A one is possible.
LEONARD: Marriage is scary. You're scared, I'm scared. But it doesn't make me not want to do it. It makes me want to hold your hand while we do it.
Penny loved that.
AMY: (depressed) It would make me so happy if you said things like that.
SHELDON: We got an 8.2. Trust me; you're happy.
Out at Angel Stadium, everybody was there to see Howard throw out the first pitch. Even Sheldon, whom Amy promised to buy him cotton candy and a bobblehead if he stayed for the whole game. They gave Howard the microphone, and he admitted he practiced and practiced for the first pitch and was completely scared he couldn't do it. But because it was Space Day at Angel Stadium, he had a better idea. He would have the Mars Rover deliver the first pitch. Which sounded like a great idea. Until he figured out he didn't really adjust the speed on it to be fast enough to get it down to home plate. They even came back from commercial and the rover still hadn't even traveled halfway.