Season 8 Episode 8
"The Prom Equivalency"
When the gang recreates a high school prom on the roof the of the guys’ apartment building, Sheldon feels pressure to participate in all the typical romantic traditions...[button color="black" size="small" link="http://www.cbs.com/shows/big_bang_theory/video/D2879878-47AE-0141-C2D9-8121D567FBEF/the-big-bang-theory-the-prom-equivalency/" target="blank" ]Watch The Full Episode![/button]
Things aren't going so well for Howard (Simon Helberg). His mother and Stuart (Kevin Sussman) were at Benihana the previous night, which Howard doesn't take her to that often because she jumps up like a seal whenever the chef flips a shrimp into the air. Same reason why they never go to Sea World. But Howard was OK with it, even when Raj (Kunal Nayyar) told him they went back to her house together and likely were wearing matching pajamas. But at least he wasn't as bad off as a gibbon, according to Sheldon (Jim Parsons). Talk about being teased on the playground; the gibbon is the only ape not classified as 'great', which means anthropologists went out of their way to tease it. Although Leonard (Johnny Galecki) does point out that the gibbon wouldn't know that or that its name is gibbon.
SHELDON: Sorry, kid. You got it worse than a gibbon.
Meanwhile, the ladies were having a movie night at Penny's (Kaley Cuoco-Sweeting). Fortunately, Amy (Mayim Bialik) and Bernadette (Melissa Rauch) brought snacks...and napkins, clean bowls, utensils, and a roll of toilet paper. Amy and Bernadette didn't recognize the place; Penny had folded all of her clothes. With her new work wardrobe, some things had to go, including a sexy red prom dress.
BERNADETTE: You still have it? I thought it was just balled up in the corner of a barn somewhere.
PENNY: (highly offended) What kind of teenager do you think I was?
BERNADETTE: Slutty....AMY: Easy.
PENNY: The word is "popular."
Still Penny went to her prom to enjoy herself (and six others on top of that), while Amy was on the clean-up crew at her prom. Although the DJ was nice enough to let her slow-dance with her mop to Lady in Red. Bernadette did have a date to the prom, who only went because he was interested in her friend. (AMY: OK, we get it. You had a friend and a date. Stop bragging!) But Bernadette thought it would be fun to have a prom do-over, where they could get dressed up, decorate the deck on the roof, and have the guys show up in tuxedos. Amy was on-board. Penny thought proms were silly, despite her denial she went with the captain of the football team. OK, she made out with him while his date was throwing up, but whatevs.
Howard stopped by the guys' apartment for dinner since Amy and Bernadette were out dress shopping for the prom. Bernadette was so excited, her voice actually went higher and made the neighbor's beagle howl. Raj was excited to go to a prom ever since he saw Pretty in Pink...until he saw Carrie. Fortunately, he saw Never Been Kissed most recently, so he was good to go. Sheldon never went to prom; he studied. And his explanation took much much longer than it did for me to type this entire synopsis. Penny had joined the guys for dinner, and Leonard figured she didn't want to join Amy and Bernadette because she thought the idea was lame. She didn't take the bait but did ask Leonard what he thought.
LEONARD: To be honest, it's kind of a dream come true to go to even a fake prom with a girl as beautiful as you.
PENNY: Thanks a lot. Now I can't blow this thing off without being a bitch. (yeah, I smell a setup from Leonard, too)
Bernadette was excited everybody was in. And the poor beagle next door got another sample of her higher octaves. Stuart was even coming, and Howard could only guess whom he wanted to bring to the prom. (BERNADETTE: Why can't he bring your mother? You took her to your prom!) Howard couldn't take it anymore and called Stuart, admitting he was uncomfortable with Stuart taking his mother to the prom. Stuart said he was bringing someone else and not his mother.
HOWARD: Oh, so now you're cheating on my mother???
Stuart was not happy with the insinuation. There was nothing weird going on between him and Howard's mother. (HOWARD'S MOTHER: STEWIE, YOUR BATH IS GETTING COLD!)
Sheldon, as you correctly guessed, was not thrilled about having to go to a prom. He knocked on Penny's door (two extra times, just so he had a few to bank) and suggested since she was equally ambivalent, they could pretend they were aliens taking part in a human ritual. He explained they could be just like Ford Prefect in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, who pretended to be human because he wanted to write a blurb about Earth for the book. After all, it was how he survived going to one of her plays. (SHELDON: Commander Umfrumf gave you seven thumbs up.) Now Penny had a question for him: did he plan to participate in any post-prom mating rituals with Amy? Sheldon was shocked there were post-prom mating rituals, but Penny said they usually occur unless your date drives a van with an air mattress. Sheldon said if it was part of the experience, he was open to it. Now Penny was shocked. (SHELDON: I may be an alien, but I have urges.) Sheldon figured if it was part of the custom for Amy to "firing her eggs into space, he'd happy catch them with the reproductive sac on my upper flermin."
For an alien, though, he really needed to learn how to tie a bow tie. Actually, Sheldon abandoned the alien idea because nobody else wanted to and even he was smart enough not to hire someone to do it. He put on his jacket and hid the flask he bought...which sadly only had pomegranate juice in it. Since he was embracing all the traditions of prom, Leonard inquired if that included losing his virginity with Amy. After all, hormones are usually raging on prom night. Sheldon was again worried since now that was two people who brought it up.
LEONARD: Relax, it's just a joke. You don't have hormones.
They go to meet Penny and Amy, both of whom look very beautiful in their dresses. Sheldon wasn't ready for that. In fact, he turned around quickly and went back into his apartment. Meanwhile, Raj, Emily, Howard, and Bernadette were in a limousine going to pick up Stuart. Bernadette certainly liked Emily's tattoo of Sally from The Nightmare Before Christmas. Bernadette liked that movie, as did Emily, mainly because Sally could pull her own limbs off and sew them back on. Probably not a good idea to tell Bernadette how the evil stepsisters got their feet in the glass slippers in the book version of Cinderella. Still, that would have been better for Howard than finding out whom Stuart was bringing. It wasn't Howard's mother, but the apple didn't fall far from the tree. Or the second tree, in this case. It was Jeanie, Howard's second cousin to whom he lost his virginity in her dad's Corolla. Which of course Raj just had to tell Emily. To be fair, he already told her the story to break an awkward silence between the two.
With the six of them still heading to the apartment and Sheldon locked in his bedroom, only Penny and Leonard went up to the roof to see the decorations. They were quite impressed. And as it turned out, Leonard did go to his prom. He even had a date...with a little lady he called loneliness. (LEONARD: It's OK. We had a threesome with her friend, humiliation.) Penny said she would have asked him to dance, to which he called BS. And then he claimed he would have asked her to dance, to which she called BS, but he said he would have asked her. In his mind. On the way home. While he was having a good cry. But they were there now, and they were going to have a good long slow dance. Didn't even need music. Although Leonard did thank her for wearing flats...and Penny thanked him for wearing heels.
Sheldon was in his bedroom having a full-blown panic attack. Amy was understandably worried. Sheldon felt like there was too much pressure to do all the things you traditionally did at prom, and even he thought his ass looked good in his tuxedo pants. Amy tried to convince him that all she said was he looked handsome, and she just wanted some time with him for dancing and good conversation. There was no pressure.
Speaking of pressure, Stuart relayed the story of how he met Jeanie. It was at her aunt's house when he was there with Howard's mother. (STUART: She passed me the Manischewitz, I took one look at his punim, and I almost plotzed on the kugel!) Howard thought it was weird given the relationship Stuart had with his mother, but let's face it, Howard didn't have a leg to stand on with Jeanie there, did he.
RAJ: This is so messed up.
EMILY: I know. I'm having the best time.
And as Bernadette pointed out, why would Stuart still ask her knowing the story of Jeanie and Howard and that Howard would be there?
STUART: Oh, so she's good enough for Howard but not for me?
BERNADETTE: Yeah, go have weird relationships with your own mother and cousin! This is his turf!
Penny and Leonard were still alone but they were having so much fun, especially going to a prom without a lot of drama. (Not to worry, Howard and Stuart would be out of the limo as soon as they were pulled off of each other.)
Amy had enough of Sheldon's issues. She didn't want to miss another prom and started heading out. Sheldon opened the door.
SHELDON: I really did think you looked pretty. So much so that I started to panic.
AMY: (touched) Well, you can relax. Just becuase you thought I looked pretty doesn't mean we have to spend the whole night together.
SHELDON: Were you hoping we would because it's prom?
AMY: I'm ALWAYS hoping. But tonight, I just wanted to have a nice time with you. Maybe even dance with someone who has arms.
SHELDON: Thank you for understanding.
AMY: (getting nervous) Sheldon, there's something else I've been wanting to say. But before I do, just...I want you to know you don't have to say it back. I know you're not ready, and I don't want you to say it because social convention dictates...
SHELDON: ...I love you, too.
AMY: (floored) You said it.
SHELDON: There's no denying I have feelings for you that can't be explained in any other way. I briefly considered I had a brain parasite, but that seems even more far-fetched. The only conclusion was love.
Now it was Amy who couldn't breathe. She was having a panic attack, and Sheldon knew the cure was to lie down with her feet elevated.
SHELDON: (Amy ran to lie on his bed) Whoah, whoah, whoah! Just because I said I love you doesn't mean girls are allowed in my room!
At least they took prom pictures. Leonard and Penny looked great, Amy was ecstatic...and Sheldon had his eyes closed, Howard and Bernadette didn't react well to Raj going "say...cousin!", and Stuart was interrupted by Howard's mother, who wanted him home right now.